Today

A poem I wrote on August 15th, 2011. From the forthcoming ebook Loveness: Poems from the Heart.

Today by sirmuMsila

today I’m feeling like… a little out of the box. a little outside the of the norm. Outside of everything… everybody. The news makes me scared, angry, pensive, jittery. the drama. the opinions. the pop elation. feel like if I turn it off I’ll miss something. I flip through my twitter scroll and again I am scared, angry or I laugh but then… I wonder does that person who said something funny on twitter not know that some father chopped his kids head off or that some 30 soldiers got killed in Afghanistan or some dude got shot by police or some elderly woman’s window got shot in or some guy broke in some woman’s home and raped her or some guy riding his bike got run over? I’m on the facebook and stocks is down and someone called the Pres a spook and the degrading of the dollar is happening like they said and the radicals is all up at each other and the wind is knocking over stages and the rain is opening holes in the ground and rich people cant stop telling me how rich they is and I’m wanting… and waiting… and wars are being started and information is being forced and hacked and sported.

We buy into people selling they life for thirteen episodes a season. cut by commercials convincing me I aint good enough. and the device we sit to see it on hypnotize our dollars while glowing lights convince us we’re plotting our solo missions. Where we whisper our deepest secrets into the fiber optics that block out the sun and we’ll say that we saw it and that we knew what we was looking at when we see it coming pushing the stars aside rushing our investigations into whose fault it was not to fund the telescope. we flossing instead of fixing our own levies. looking for hand outs from the land whose hand we want out our pocket. I’m feeling way outside it. way out the way I feel when I pay more to get to and back from the place I get paid less at. I look at TV and I wonder where common sense at. He’ll drop the science! but he dropped the sense and reality aint real. Now I’m feeling like I don’t even understand what I feel. I look for love.
Somebody posted something bout love but when I take a closer look its an invite to an event at the love lounge where i can get my freak on. 5 dollar sex on the beaches before 8. 10 dollars at the door. I need something positive all general and yellow daisy-like cause that’s what I’m used to to keep me from wanting to chuck it all. like a quote from the bible or my horoscope letting me put the blame on mercury’s retrograde. I need some informative confirmation that this aint all the dream or maybe it’s just wysiswyg, what you see is what you get. We thread the rope we hang round our neck. ahh… maybe it’s just that end of the summer feeling or the world bout to shake off the shit that fuck with it from the front. I only know what I know. beauty. It’s what I make myself miss daily. so that that moment I see her will make everything else worthless.

-goRealer